Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, Ghandi, Martin Luther King Jr. … Meat Loaf. What do these infamous names have in common? They’re a part of elite members of society that are quoted on Capitol Hill in order for lawmakers to make points about their bills. And persuade or dissuade their colleagues to see their point of view. This week the latter name, Meat Loaf, joined the upper echelons of society when lawmakers engaged in a Meat Loaf quote off during a banking committee meeting on Tuesday of this week. And it’s not a quote or two. They really went after it. It’s absolutely hilarious.
Now, the two hosts of the story on NPR, who broke the story, said they were surprised that so many senators new about Meat Loaf. And I’m sitting here like, really? You didn’t know that conservative, white men who are baby boomers happen to love Meat Loaf? I mean, there’s two groups you can always count on with that demographic: The Eagles and Meat Loaf. Every baby boomer father loves at least one of those two.
The quote started with Senator Sherrod Brown of Ohio. He rose in protest of a bill who’s meaning is literally in the title: “The Economic Growth, Regulatory Relief and Consumer Protection Act.” Below I’ve typed the conversation. Not the whole thing, we don’t need to read that. But some of these highlights are absolutely gut busting.
Senator Brown: As Meat Loaf used to to sing, two out of three ain’t bad. But this bill doesn’t even fit the Meat Loaf minimum.
This was only the beginning. Senator John Neely Kennedy of Louisiana stood up to counter.
Senator Neely Kennedy: Meat Loaf also said there ain’t no Coup DeVille in the bottom of the Cracker Jack box. In other words, we live in the real world.
The Thom Tillis from North Carolina chimed in.
Senator Tillis: In that same song he said, baby, we can talk all night, but that ain’t getting us nowhere. So I’m looking forward to processing the amendment.
Then Senator Chris Van Holland of Maryland got up with his piece.
Senator Van Holland: Meat Loaf also said, life is a lemon and I want my money back. So on behalf of all the consumers who got the short end of the stick from Wells Fargo and Equifax, I want to have a bill that makes sure they get their money back.
Eventually the committee chairman Mike Crapo surrendered.
Senator Crapo: I guess I’ll have to learn more about Meat Loaf.
Senator Tim Scott: No sir, you don’t have to.
Senator Crapo: You, Senator Tim Scott, took the words right out of my mouth.
I guess they must have been kissing.
Congrats Meat Loaf on obtaining a level of stardom that is reserved only for the true great figures of history.
